Our Tacky Christmas Decor

Christmas seems to bring out the needy in me. I neeeeeed cinnamon candles burning. I neeeeeed Christmas lights strung on our house. I neeeeeed a Christmas tree. But the truth of the matter is I don't want to do anything to make my requests come to life. In a perfect world, lights would be automatically strung, candles would burn without matches, and a tree would magically appear.

Last week, while I was away at a conference, JD surprised me with a Christmas tree and new ornaments. What possessed him to buy new ornaments is beyond me (other than the suspicion he didn't want to dig through our garage to find the decor), but when I arrived home, he laid everything out. And all I saw was purple.

Why purple? I HAVE NO IDEA. Purple glitter ornaments…silver balls…turquoise stars. I can't even. It was such a nice gesture I didn't have the heart to tell him I burned my corneas looking at this homage to the 80s. So we decorated. At the end of the night, we stood back to admire our handiwork and JD said, It looks like our tree belongs in a tacky Christmas catalogue, right? Umm, yes. Or it's perfectly suited for Jem and the Holograms.

Seeing how we're all about a tacky Christmas this year, here are a few things I might just pick up to complete our hot mess look…

These tacky Christmas sweaters are perfect for keeping your wine nice and toasty (?!?!?)…and speaking of keeping things warm, let's not forget your toilet seat

Just in case your tree needs some spicing up…

I don't even really understand these crazy pickle ornaments, but seeing how my husband decided green and purple was a good look for our tree, WHY NOT ADD THIS ATROCITY WHILE WE'RE AT IT?

Okay, but, really…these are the types of lights JD would love to have resting in our tree. He's one bb gun shy of being a Ralphie impersonator.

From our tacky tree to yours, Merry Christmas!