07.06.12 Personal

When Cottage Cheese Made Me Feel Alive

hen the nurses wheeled me from the emergency room and admitted me to the hospital I insisted they had the wrong girl. I have food poisoning, I said. I ATE BAD COTTAGE CHEESE, I practically yelled as the elevator doors closed. In spite of my protestations, it was the 4th of July and I'd be spending the night in the hospital.

JD arrived to room 403 with sparkling water, the first season of Parenthood, and his usual smile. I stared at the ceiling and cried. It had less to do with the fact that I was admitted and more to do with priorities. My priorities. They, much like the fireworks somewhere in the distance, felt splayed across the night sky. I turned to JD and promised to change...everything was changing. I'm going to take long walks, I said. Oh! And drink pina coladas! With no sugar...and virgin...because I'm BEING HEALTHY! And I'll dance in the rain. And I won't complain any more! And I won't buy any more neon pants like I promised!

It was one of the longest nights together. Every time I wavered, he was my solid and though I hope to never repeat that night again, I'm blown away to have someone as incredible as him by my side.

When I was released, JD asked if I still wanted to continue with the engagement session I had planned to shoot. In light of everything we'd been through, I turned to him and said yes. Actually, it was hell yes but seeing how my mother thinks hell is a swear word, I promised her I wouldn't blog about it. Oops.

I photographed the engagement session because every inch of my soul wanted to be nowhere but behind my camera. A place I feel excited, challenged, fulfilled, and--mostly--alive.
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cassandra-m - Glad u r better girl...And btw/ GREAT PIC.  07.13.12 - 1:50pm
Monika Greenaway - :-( on food poisoning...worst ever. But :-) Parenthood. I LOVE THAT SHOW.   07.13.12 - 1:21pm
Shelly Spithoff - Wow Jasmine that sounds intense. All that because of cottage cheese? What was the eventual diagnosis?  07.12.12 - 11:03pm
Photographer Durango CO - I can totally relate. If I had enough clients to be shooting several times a day every day, I would be there, sick or not. Beautiful images.  07.12.12 - 7:32pm
Life with Kaishon - That is a hell of a great picture : ) And I don't even curse. I just wanted to show solidarity. Stay well.  07.10.12 - 3:27pm
Cathy Ann Plec - Glad to know you are okay.... Just wanted you to so inspire me... :)  07.07.12 - 11:34pm
Christine Chang - I had a similar episode on the 3rd. Quite dramatic, but gooooood stuff.  07.07.12 - 3:37pm
Bobbie Brown - Oh my! I am so so sorry for you! Wow... Glad you are feeling better now, and this picture? well, it is just perfect!   07.07.12 - 9:10am
Diana Liang - Hazle caso a tu mamá, hell is a swear word. You must use 'heck' instead! HAHAHA... I am glad you are feeling better and ALIVE. The world needs you and loves you.  07.06.12 - 8:49pm
JohnCain Sargent - I could only hope that my wife would someday write such an honorable blog post about me. Yours is a marriage truly blessed, J*.  07.06.12 - 7:10pm
Denise Prichett - I am sooo bummed out for you. No fireworks!! I spent 5 + hours with my boyfriend at the ER on Sunday. I really hate hospitals. Been there so many times for him and my mom. I know one day it will be my turn and I will be panicked like you described. Wishing you a speedy recovery!!! Love the picture you put with this post.   07.06.12 - 6:03pm
LEOLAK - Glad you are feeling better and hope you get to 100% soon!! GORGE pic!!! Can't wait to see the rest.   07.06.12 - 5:23pm
Regina Chayer - I can so relate. It has been six months of pain, tears, fears but I am back shooting again after my elbow replacement. I feel alive again too... I get it like only another photographer can. Thanks for your email of a few months ago and your support. I know I couldn't have done it without my partner/second shooter/husband and all around wonderful guy either.  07.06.12 - 4:48pm
Manya Keseloff - I'm sorry you got sick. I'm glad you are feeling better. I hope to one day have a man as good as JD to be by my side. You are very lucky to have each other. I too feel the same as you when I'm behind the camera! I'm sure the shoot was perfect!   07.06.12 - 4:30pm
sarah danaher - grateful you're okay... grateful God has give you such a perfect-for-you man to care for you... grateful that photography is a place you feel alive. xoxo  07.06.12 - 4:10pm
Cindy Moore - I'm so beyond thrilled that God has blessed you. And beyond words happy that you and JD have an amazing bond that inspires so many including me. I am, as I'm sure all of us readers are, ecstatic that you are better! And as always this picture just proves what an amazing kick butt photographer and person you are! :)  07.06.12 - 1:36pm
Lisa - Now that is dedication. I commend you on getting yourself to exactly where you wanted to be, behind the camera, no matter the circumstances.   07.06.12 - 12:46pm
Brittany G. - Chuey is such an amazing Husband. He's observant, patient, chivalrous (although I'm still mad he didn't let me pay for pizza), and does all this without a hair out of place. He truly deserves the "Man of the Year" award! I hope you get answers and stay feeling better. I told Bri it's cuz you don't eat meat <3  07.06.12 - 12:13pm
Tanya A - You POOR thing. I'm sorry you were so unwell and that you felt better enough to shoot that engagement session. Please be sure to take care of you while you recover.   07.06.12 - 12:10pm
Soraya Abreu - "Be still... I know that I am God... " Psalm 46:10  07.06.12 - 12:04pm
Tamara @ Fishy Face Studios - you & JD rock!  07.06.12 - 12:03pm
Camille - What a trooper you are. Hope you are feeling better. Can't wait to see more of this session.  07.06.12 - 12:02pm
Tarah - Jasmine, What I love about your posts is you make your life lessons something every single reader can learn from. Thank you for being real, honest and therefore beautiful. I'm so sorry this is how you spent your 4th. Maybe JD will buy you your own fireworks show ;) Take care of yourself <3  07.06.12 - 11:54am
Ashley Goodwin - Food poisoning?!?!?! Oh no!!!!!! That's terrible! Almost as bad as no more neon pants!!!!! Feel better love!   07.06.12 - 11:37am
Erin Oveis Brant - hell yeah! (sorry mama *) SO glad you are okay!! xo  07.06.12 - 11:09am
Elizabeth Langford - So sorry to hear you got so sick :( Hope you're feeling much better. The picture of this couple is awesome!  07.06.12 - 11:06am
Frank Donnino - Glad you are ok Jasmine. Thank God.  07.06.12 - 10:56am
Chelsea Miller - Sometimes your life comes into perspective in ways that you never imagined. Do what you love, and love what you do.... but never forget to stop and enjoy life and experience things without a camera in front of you. You never know what moments you might miss if you don't. Balance the best of both worlds, and you will never be happier. Glad you are feeling better!!  07.06.12 - 10:37am
Allie Dean - So glad you are feeling better! Very glad that illness makes us grateful for LIFE :)  07.06.12 - 10:33am
Wendy Alana - Jasmine, my husband and I have been in and out of the hospital this past month. Most recently I had to get stitches last night. I started to cry because I said to the nurse, I AM A WEDDING PHOTOGRAPHER! I need my hand. Michael laughed and said she looked at me like I was she did not see the importance that I did of my role....If this was any other job...I would have called in sick...but when you do something you love, nothing and I mean nothing will keep you away. You constantly amaze me with your posts because it's as if I am living your story, post by post. Keep inspiring and feel better. xoxo  07.06.12 - 10:25am
Haley Johnston - Oh my word! I hope you are feeling better!! Gorgeous photo! Would have never guessed you were sick!   07.06.12 - 10:25am
Stephanie Rose - Wow. Amazing post. Glad to hear you're better!  07.06.12 - 10:22am
Christy Tyler - I hope you're feeling 100% better love! And that shot is gorgeous! Can't wait to see the full session!  07.06.12 - 10:19am
Sandra Fazzino Photography - Oh. Boy. I'm doing some really good reading right now on the yin and yang of life, and it's apparent you have a whole lotta yang happening. Hope you can find some way to incorporate daily doses of yin!!!! We need you in this big beautiful photo community, but YOU NEED YOU MORE. xx  07.06.12 - 10:15am
Priscilla Longshore - so sorry you were so sick love.. hope u r better now  07.06.12 - 10:15am
Tasha Prescott-Wilson - Get Better J*! And yes, I agree, you really must do better at taking care of YOU first. TPW  07.06.12 - 10:13am
Rachel Del Grosso - As usual, you are such an inspiration Jasmine!  07.06.12 - 10:13am